Applicants who wish to apply for an infant will be referred to licensed private child placing agencies.
My meth baby adoption.
I was able to adopt my foster child after fostering him for a year. I was just sure as I got older I would never be able to be a mom. I couldn’t get pregnant, nothing worked. By then, private adoption was out of the question. All my money was spent on fertility. My last option was fostering to adopt. My advice to anyone wanting kids, try having your own child before ever considering foster to adopt. Because it is a very difficult road, but it is Not Impossible. Foster adoption was the best choice for me.
At my first orientation meeting for foster classes, they stressed over and over, “You will not get a newborn”. No way, No how will you ever get a newborn. The speaker told us, it didn’t matter if we knew someone who knew someone and they got a baby. Forget it, it doesn’t happen. EVER. PERIOD. End of discussion. Now onto the topic of all the 8 year olds with severe problems we want you to take in. (Ok she didn’t really say that about 8 year olds, but that is essentially what every person associated with the foster system will tell you and beat into your head.) Take an older kid. My thought to that was, no thank you, that’s not for me. I applaud all parents who are willing to do this, because fostering is tough and that is a gross understatement.
A state DHS adoption license only, will not get you very far. No one will just call you for a perfect little child. In fact they probably won’t call you at all. I filled out my renewal paperwork just a few days ago and right on the application it states “Applicants who wish to apply for an infant will be referred to licensed private child placing agencies.” Translation: if you want to try for a baby, you must foster. As a licensed adoptive mom, my support worker suggested I attend the adoption DHS worker meet and greet night that is held once a year. This way the adoption workers can get to know you as an adoptive parent. This apparently is the only way you might get called for a baby for adoption. In short you meet the right worker and they might remember you. Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of children nation wide in need of adoption. I just knew after checking out my options I wanted to try for a baby. Here is a link to check out http://www.adoptuskids.org/meet-the-children/search . All of these children are in need, but this just wasn’t for me.
So now what? After I got my foster and adoption license I waited, and waited. Patience…….I waited almost 6 months for Charlie to arrive. The first calls to foster, even though my age range was 0-3 years old, were for siblings and older children, sometimes they even called about teens. Because if the foster matching agents exhausted their list of families to call in the right age range, everyone possible got called. I agreed to 5 different foster care placements, and they all fell through. And then I got baby Elsa, my first foster newborn. I talked to the matching specialist after the last placement didn’t go through and I told her I wanted to get called for a newborn. She must have put me on the top of the list, because I got the call within an hour for Elsa. My first newborn Meth Baby.
So maybe that is the secret. Get friendly with the matching agents and tell them directly what you would like to be called about for a foster placement. This does not mean you will get to adopt the baby, as I did not, but for me it was a start. And I was on my way to navigating the foster system. I knew then I would have to wait for another baby, and a meth baby wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought, and maybe, just maybe It was meant to be.
As I think back to that first orientation meeting, I can see now that they were probably just trying to discourage people from thinking that they could easily get a baby. But I am here to tell everyone who wants to try for a baby, it is Absolutely Possible and I adopted my baby Charlie.
MISSION-ADOPT – Success