Fetal alcohol syndrome: I just can’t say yes to that

I do not foster children with FAS

For a thorough explanation on the syndrome, check out the link below, since I have only had a small touch of what FAS  is…


I know a foster/adoptive parent who adopted a baby born with fetal alcohol syndrome. The way she described it I knew I couldn’t raise a child with this. As an adult her son still suffers from the side effects. Her example was “If I stepped off the curb and was going to be hit by a car, he would not try to save or help me. He would just standby and  watch with zero empathy”. He could function as an adult , but he has no feelings, he just can’t feel. Nothing would phase him. It is like there is something not wired correctly in his brain because things just do not connect. Another friend fostered a 17 year old and there was definitely something not wired right in his brain. It was like when you tell someone don’t touch the stove because it is hot and you will get burned. They will keep on touching it because there is no connection, they simply don’t get it. This is one effect I know I would not be able to deal with. Even if they are able to thrive and grow will they still have this lack of human connection?

I was worried my baby might have been exposed to this. I was so relieved to see him show empathy. He was only 11  months old. I was at the bottom of the steps and a container  of cat food came crashing down the stairs, spilling all over. I was mad about all the food spilled and Charlie started screaming from the top of the stairs. He was worried that I was hurt. I had turned it into a chaotic situation and he reacted with  an emotion of empathy for me. I assured him I was ok and I thought, Wow, thank the Lord he can feel that empathy at a young age. I knew then he did not have fetal alcohol syndrome. Because with the drug exposure I thought he might have been exposed to alcohol as well.

Maybe my baby was exposed to alcohol, but he definitely does not have the effects or tendencies of fetal alcohol syndrome… so far.